Distressed about a relationship?
Counselling can help you identify problematic patterns in your current relationship and teach you more effective ways of relating. If you are grappling with a relationship problem and would like some help, I encourage you to contact me on 08 8363 3974.
Have you ever questioned whether your romantic relationship is healthy? Do you even wonder what a healthy relationship looks like? Do you question how close you are to breaking up?
As a family therapist, I can help you explore the power dynamics, healthy and unhealthy alliances and help you build communication skills that will enhance the health of your relationships. While the early months of a relationship can feel effortless and exciting, successful long-term relationships require ongoing effort and compromise by both partners. Building healthy patterns early in your relationships can be a solid foundation in the long term.
Good relationship habits
Build – there is an “I Like U Bank” in every relationship which trades in two currencies: $Appreciation and $Respect. Focusing on all the little things your partner says and does for you builds a foundation of appreciation and respect. Happy couples make a point of noticing the smallest opportunities to say “thank you” to their partners, rather than focus on their partners’ mistakes.
Establish – Establish a pattern of apologizing if you make a mistake or hurt your partner’s feelings. No one is perfect. Respect your partner’s limitations because you have limitations, too.
Change – we live in a time of rapid change. The art of living a relationship well is in psychological flexibility. Welcome change as inevitable rather than trying to keep it from happening.
Checking-in – Changes in life bring changing expectations and goals. Check in regularly with each other. If a couple ignores difficult topics for too long, their relationship is likely to drift into rocky waters without their noticing.
What to do when conflict arises
Disagreements in a relationship are normal. It is inevitable that there will be times of sadness, tension, or outright anger between you and your partner. The source of these problems may lie in unrealistic/unreasonable demands, unexplored expectations, or unresolved issues/behaviours in one partner or in the relationship. Resolving conflicts requires honesty, a willingness to consider your partner’s perspective even if you don’t fully understand it, and lots of communication.